Friday, July 13, 2012
Becoming a Mom~ July 13th, 2006
The first time I held Sam I was so sick, I don't actually remember holding him, I remember the devastation of knowing that they were taking him away from me, and that he wasn't healthy enough to not go to the neonatal ICU. I remember feeling that I failed him miserably and that God had given me this miracle and I had failed him. I remember the shear heartbreak of knowing that I hadn't been good enough. This photo still makes me cry. I don't actually remember this moment, but I can feel how heartbroken I was, letting go of this baby that I had carried and prayed for for so long.